Dear Taco Scientists: Tacophobia

The fear of pregnant women eating tacos at high speeds. Derived from the words tocophobia (the fear of pregnant women), tachophobia (the fear of high speeds) and taco.
-Urban Dictionary


Dear Taco Scientists,

I am interested in adopting a taco-based lifestyle, but I have a confession to make. I am actually a little afraid of eating tacos in public. I tend to spill out the fillings all over myself and make a mess. Should I practice with a burrito first?

Tacophobic in Tempe


Dear Tacophobic,

Firstly, let us address your last question. No.

Secondly, we have to wonder, are you tilting your head when eating tacos? Are you folding your tortillas properly? Are you opening your mouth when the taco gets close enough? We believe that everyone can benefit from a Taco Cleanse, but you have to be willing to put in the work. It takes practice and dedication for the unfortunately taco-challenged folks out there. We believe in you. Also, it might be time to stop worrying about what others think of you. If they can’t look past your hot sauce stained sweatshirt and see your inner bodymind igniting with the heat of a thousand jalapeƱos, then why would you care what they think? Good luck in your taco journey, TiT.

In Taco Solidarity,
The Taco Scientists

Have a question for the Taco Scientists? Send it to tacocleanse (at) gmail (dot) com with the subject line “Dear Taco Scientists.”


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